Listening Is the Highest Form of Loving - Episode 169
Episode Transcript
Hi there I'm Terces and I want to take a moment and welcome you to the Unreasonably Grateful podcast. Some of you have been with me for a good while now. So welcome back. Others of you are new and I'm grateful that you're here. So. Just a couple of reminders, I started this podcast really in the early Covid years as a way to connect and share my journey. People had asked me for a while about doing something like that and so I did. We know that we learn from each other's stories and sometimes sharing our story makes it a little easier for others to see something about themselves and their own story. Somehow it's easier when we're listening to somebody else's story. So, I did. I started doing that and then after a while, I began to read the stories from my book, once my book was published. And, I just started a new series which is sharing about Love. All the different ways that love shows up and expresses, and how do we welcome more of it into our lives, make more room for it. Be more willing to express it, share it, and receive it.
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And today's particular session is called "Listening is the Highest form of Loving". And obviously, the kind of love I'm talking about here is not romantic love or even familial love, although hey, it's great to listen to your partner or to your family members. I'm just talking about the big love the big agape love. How do we express that unconditional love that actually flows in us, through us, and around us all the time based on our willingness and our ability to get out of its way?
I was talking recently to one of my kids about being awakened in the middle of the night and how in stressful times in my life or in times when I felt all alone or lost or afraid and found myself awake. That's when I would just like get on my knees and pray and sometimes the only prayer I had was “Help, help me.” And over the years. It's been amazing, the response I've had to that prayer. And now I actually look forward to being awakened in the middle of the night because it's become like the most powerful, intimate connection I have with that big unconditional love force that some people call God, I call God. Yeah, that wisdom.
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That divine inheritance that's ours and that's one of those places where I listen and also my call for help is an example of how I'm heard, how I'm listened to.
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And then if we take that down and we relate it to the individual relationships in our lives, I've noticed when I listen when I'm really good at listening when I'm not thinking about what I'm going to say or if I agree or disagree or if I like what they're saying or all the other things that perhaps you and I think of when people are speaking. If I just listen, what I'm aware of is I actually experience the person I'm listening to as one of those divine beings as someone who is precious and divine and worthy and lovable and yeah it's so rewarding. So what I'd love to have us all do this week is see if we can't just slow down and listen. And sometimes a great practice in listening is asking the other person, "can I share with you what I heard?" And then repeating back to them as verbatim as possible without adding or subtracting anything. And just checking to see did you actually hear what they're saying. And I know when I first started doing that, I was nervous because I was like, "oh my gosh I'm like losing track, am I going to remember what they said?" But that's more of not listening and when we are really listening...
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you will be able to repeat back to them or recreate what they've said. Probably pretty close to verbatim. So practice that this week and see what your experience is. Just check in with people and ask, "Can I share with you what I heard?" And then see how good you are at actually listening. And if they say yeah, that's what I said, that's great! And if they don't, then ask them to say it again. Ask them if you can repeat back to them again until you get that you actually did hear what they said. There's something so beautiful about being heard. It leaves people with that they matter and that they're heard. That they're seeing that they're valued and that they matter. So it's a really beautiful practice. I want to encourage you to take that on this week because I really do believe that listening is the highest form of loving.
Okay so, quick reminder, I offer personal sessions on Tuesday mornings and you can sign up here. It's really just a way for me to connect more intimately and personally with you. And it's an opportunity for me to listen to you and for you to actually feel heard. It's on a donation basis. I would so love to hear from you and in the meantime have a beautiful, beautiful week and I'll see you next week.